Self care is definitely something I have always struggled with. I’m a ‘list’ kind of person. I often have a list for my list, if that even makes sense. It’s a great way for our brains to dump it all on paper and give us some much needed headspace.

I was delighted to be offered the chance to review the book ‘PUT YOURSELF FIRST’ (Click link to purchase your copy)

Like most women and mothers I find myself putting my children, my motherly duties and well just about everything and everyone else involved in my life ahead of my own wants and needs.

I really enjoyed reading this book. The reason my post is late is actually written inside this very book! Making ‘me’ time, or the lack of it in my case. I feel I knew most of its contents already and so bar a few new pieces of information this was a great refresher and a solid reminder to get my ass in gear!

The book is broken up into 8 chapters. The last chapter being a ‘self project’ where you can put everything you’ve learnt throughout the book into action. I won’t go into too much detail because this would certainly be a worthwhile purchase and a good pick me up to re-read points every so often when you’re struggling at a low point.

You First.

Yes, really.

What are your goals? What are your dreams? It doesn’t matter. Because, unless you put YOU first, you’re unlikely to achieve them.

What an opening statement on page one! I was HOOKED!!

I haven’t put myself first for many years. Others may somewhat think differently. I don’t have any goals and I’ve forgotten all of my dreams. I lost my identity years before I had my children.

The first two chapters had the biggest impact for me. ‘Giving yourself permission to be a priority’ and ‘Overcoming barriers to putting yourself first’

I feel worn out and tired most days and I’ve slowly realised this is because I don’t stop. There’s always something to do. I’ve always thought if I cram as much as I can into one day, then the following day maybe a little more relaxing and I may have the chance for some guilt free ‘me time.’ This never happens because it’s just one big constant circle.

My Son (Aged 7) is Severely Autistic and non-verbal. Having a routine we adhere to is imperative, so he knows roughly when and what’s going to happen next. I try to follow this routine daily to the best I can for both my children. Otherwise I find I’m spending the rest of the day playing catch up with a snowball and time slips through my fingers.

Making a routine for ourselves works in exactly the same way. I’ve always liked to plan ahead and know what’s going to happen next. I’m a very visual person so I love lists, charts and post it notes. It’s great to see everything I have to do rather than keeping it stored in my head, stressing me out.

Having a balanced routine where you can get everything on your ‘to do list’ completed, complete the online shopping, keep on top of house work and motherly duties, exercise and still have some guilt free ‘YOU time’ is an art I have yet to learn. But…by following the simple steps in this book it’s definitely achievable.

The main points for me –

  • YOU time is important. It’s NOT being selfish and you don’t need to ask for permission ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup’
  • Stop being so hard on yourself. ‘Talk to yourself like you would talk to someone you love’
  • Recognise the greatness within.
  • Prioritise and make a schedule.

‘One of the biggest barriers to making changes in our lives is ourselves’

Well, didn’t that just hit the nail on the head! This book speaks total sense! It’s just the right amount of motivation and encouragement I need to make these small changes gradually to better myself.

Every so often when I feel my head is going to explode I draw a spider graph. I put me in the middle and at the end of each spider leg is a different person/ subject. Then I write a list of everything thats effecting me in each category.

I tell myself that I will conquer each of these gradually…it doesn’t happen! You know what though, sometimes it’s just good to get it all out!

‘PUT YOURSELF FIRST’ will help you and me to work through difficult stages like this and how to overcome these barriers.

The rest of the book just flows. It’s such an easy read, you won’t want to put it down. Everything about the type of person you are today depends on the choices you make and have made. We attract what we think, we are what we eat etc.

  • Be positive – Attract positive, whether this be luck, friends, relationships, careers etc
  • Eat healthy & exercise – Feel good, look good, have good health
  • Exhausted – Go to bed earlier, don’t drink alcohol/ caffeine before bed, make changes in your room ie ticking clock, too much light, delegate jobs to help

Those are just some of the valuable points I took away with me. Page 58 is the real eye opener for me. This clearly shows where it all went wrong for myself and that no matter how hard I worked on myself much BIGGER changes needed to be made before the real me can truly flourish again.

I hope you enjoyed reading. Let me know what you think of the book. I have vowed to start making gluten-free seeded bread as part of my gradual change to eat healthier. Let me know what changes you make.

You can contact me via –

Email – enquiries@clarelee.co.uk

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/clareleexo/

Clare xo


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