Me? Lost for words, now that is rare! As I stood in the shower on robot mode washing may hair I thought ‘I really need to post a blog’ I’ve felt a little stretched lately and when the kids are finally asleep and my chores are done the last thing I try and do is think. It’s as though I’ve shut down in a sense. My mind is empty, my emotions switched off, I was drawing a blank.
Then I thought I could write a little update about what we’ve been up to and how the kids are etc. But let’s be honest who really gives a monkeys?!
So I’m sat on the bedroom floor downloading music, reliving old clubbing days in my head when I receive a text asking me to call. Huge amounts of panic flooded me. Whilst on the phone it was then it hit me hard.
I’m just living each day because I have to, I’m not embracing life to it’s fullest. I’ve become a robot on auto pilot, a Mum stuck in a boring routine. I’m not taking reasonable risks and being adventurous with my kiddies. I’m not being the fun mum I always dreamt I’d be. I’ve been so caught up in my own choices and ‘life’ that I’ve become clouded about what living is all about.
As I put the phone down a huge lump appears in my throat, tears stream and I’m utterly choked. What an exhaustion of such precious and valuable time that I shall never get back. 30 years and other than my beautiful babies that I’m immensely proud of, what have I really achieved?
It doesn’t matter about what colour hair you have, what trainers you wear or even the places you’ve visited, etc etc. What truly matters is what’s within and what makes us happy. It’s time to follow your heart and your dreams and live life to its fullest. From this day forward it’s time to embrace life. Take (reasonable) risks, if you’re not happy do something that makes you happy. Start saying ‘yes’ more and trying new things, meet new people and face your fears.
Life is too short!